fashionxxvictim

fashionxxvictim @ 2009-05-21T10:42:00

2009-05-21T15:50:50Z

so... yesterday sean and I talked in the morning

and we've decided that we're going on a break. Actually, I stupidly asked him if he wanted to break up, he said no, but then laid out that he needs to do some self-improvement right now. He wants to start acting like the 19 year old college student, with a job, and his shit straight. He needs to stop being selfish and be a good brother, and friend, and boyfriend. He sayd that he isn't fair to me; he does things I have a big problem with, and he explodes at me anytime I ask him to be rational about it. I never noticed these things, but he doesn't thinnk its fair for me to have to go through this.

i just want him back. He says he still loves me, he just wants to improve himself for everyone in his life and himself. I just wish he didn't have to leave me for it. He says we're still best friends, and that we can get back together when he's better, but i don't want this.

i dunno, maybe he's going to turn into the sean I'm suppose dto be with, instead of the one he is right now. i sure hope so. :(

fashionxxvictim @ 2009-04-09T16:50:00

2009-04-09T20:53:18Z

PLS 340- Mass Media and American POlitics
PHI 220- Asthetics Supplemental Writing Skills
PLS 103- Issues in World POlitics
LIB 320- Social Autobiography in the U.S. Civil Rights Movement

I have now finished all gen eds and am a junior.

fashionxxvictim @ 2009-03-30T10:31:00

2009-03-30T16:14:45Z

I am so scared for this summer. I really wish it would stopcoming so fast, because i'm not ready. This dorm is more than just a room, it's my home now, and the girl that lives next door and the boy on the other side are more than just neighbors. They're my best friends; one's the only person I've ever been this connected to.

How am i supposed to go from being able to stay until whenever, eat what i want, do what i want, sleep next to my boy, and see him every day, to only seeing him maybe once or twice a month for the next four months? I don't think i can do it. Not with the way things are

fashionxxvictim @ 2009-03-04T12:03:00

2009-03-04T17:14:46Z

I don't think i have ever felt more at peace with my life.
Sure, my dad yells at me for not having a job.
Zach can be a douche and he irritates sean all the time.
I've just ;earned to fuck it. Shut my mouth and take the shit but i really don't care.

Seany makes me so incredibly happy. We were looking back through eveerything and realized we've been kind of dating since mid October. I think I'm in love with him. ACtually, I'm positive I'm in love with him.

<3

fashionxxvictim @ 2009-02-20T15:11:00

2009-02-20T20:12:19Z

you guys were right.
I absolutely love rachel.
I got to meet her last night.
She's just protective because a lot of girls have screwed over her big brother, and they're really close.

fashionxxvictim @ 2009-02-17T11:30:00

2009-02-17T16:33:36Z

so, i finally, official have a title.
Unfortunately, my boyfriend's little sister hates my guts and thinks it's disgusting.
she actually said that when she saw a picture of us kissing, she wanted to vomit.
that's just great.

fuck my life.

fashionxxvictim @ 2009-01-25T20:28:00

2009-01-26T01:32:28Z

so...

Sean and i are kind of like dating.
no titles, or anything. and we don't call it dating.
he's my sweetheart; boything; babe
he calls me wife, m'lady; the missus.
lindsay said we're so cute it's sick.

I've been sick for about a week.
He's been taking care of me.
It's odd, i haven't let someone take care of me sick since i was like, seven years old.
He treats me like a freaking princess.
We're spending the weekend at home, so if anyone is going to be in the heights, ring me up and we'll see if you can meet him.

very very long story.

2008-12-21T07:00:47Z

so....i'm home.
i wish i weren't.

Monday to wednesday of last week i had finals.
Monday was philosophy, i got to listen to presentations. Sean texted me in the middle because we needed to talk when i got home. My final finished at 3:50 and i had an appointment at 4. Rush rush. i have a psych appt on the 13th of January to be put on anti-anxiety meds and anti-depressants. Came home around 5:30 and somehow sean knew where I'd gone. that kid must be psychic, cause i only told lindsay and she didn't say a word to anyone. We talked for a while, and he tried to make me promise i would never play with Xanax, which pissed me off, cause he's not my father. Tracee and wes came in while i was talking with sean and it was like sensory overload. I broke and had to leave and sit in my room alone for a while. Lindsay came and hung later that night, and sean came to talk. He told me sweet things and explained shit and he didn't care if lindsay heard him say them. I had been mad at him, just frustrated with how things were happening and that he was being so freaking overprotective but he explained everything. I guess he was afraid i was in too deep, everyone told him i'd gone off the edge. He didn't know it was a lie. I just wanted to feel okay. No one was supposed to see me like that, all fucked up and out of it... He said that it scared him, because of all the people he knows, he cares about me more than pretty much everyone else and he thought we were close enough that if i felt so horrible i would come to him before i made that decision. He wouldn't be able to live with himself.

He told me he loved me, and i couldn't say it back. I wanted to scream at him and say "Don't say things you don't really mean. I don't like lies. i don't like liars. If you don't mean it don't say it." Then he told me, "those aren't empty words." and i broke down, so he took me and held me and said that he was so proud of me for finally going to see the counselors. For making the psych appointment and getting myself the help i really need. he wishes i'd let him treat me hollistically, but i can't right now, so instead he's just going to support me emotionally. It was a really important event, i guess, in my life. Then he told me to listen to "A little help from my friends," by the Beatles and made me laugh and promise to help him study for psych the next night.

Tuesday i had two finals and hung out with danielle. Texted sean all day. came home around 8 and everyone was all fucked up. I made sean, Zach and wes pancakes and sean recited his psych stuff too me while almost burning himself leaning against the griddle numerous times. He disppeared for a while, then came back and we talked abit then he went to bed around midnight. Lindsay and i stayed up talking for a while.

Wednesday i had my french final, where i was hit on by a 10 year old. Came home and hung out with LIndsay until she had to leave, then hung with Tania, Ed, and ALicia for a while. We went to Kleiner and Meijer. Came home and got fucked up... a little too mcuh vodka. Too many people came in my room and i spazzed and had to leave. i tried wrapping presents, but that ended badly and sean offered to help me cause they looked so bad, but he had to go somewhere with zach and wes. I went and hung in Ali's room, cause i wanted to be alone and talk and tell her stuff cause we hadn'ttalked in a while cause she's been so busy. Anyway, i started to feel sick and i was lying there trying not to throw up when sean came back. I guess he'd gone to my room like, 4 times and couldn't find me, so he went looking in everyone else's rooms until Esha told him i was with Ali. So, he came in and i don't remember what we talked about. I guess i told him i felt like vomiting, so he told me i should get up, and he helped me off of Ali's bed and i threw up in her bathroom... yeah. i felt better after though. I guess I sent peoplea bunch of messages through Esha. I made her go to sean that i love him, and i told ed that he was a punk bitch and i would kick his ass. Ed came in and i sent him to promise sean that i'd never fuck with Xanax and some other stuff, but sean had gone to bed because he still had another final. I eventually went to my room and to sleep around 4 i guess.

Thursday i heard many interesting stories and woke up at 1 PM. I fucked around all day and hung with Allen for a while. Sean came home and we hung out for a while. Esha left, Alicia left, Allie left, Ali left, a lot of people left. Sean came home and we hung out and drank. Went to Taco Bell. Danielle called and wanted to hang out. I had to go get her, but was in no position to drive. Sean wouldn't let me, and he couldn't. So TRACEE! drove me in viktor to go get danielle. I ran down the hall skipping when she said yes, and sean came out of his room to make sure i wasn't going to drive. Then he went and took a shower because he was all sticky from sprite being poured on him. Danielle and i came back and had a small ordeal; had some fun. Sean and Zach had too much fun and sean passed out. I ate his stuffing and then drove danielle home. i'm pretty sure i came home and almost passed out in Zach doorway while watching 21.

Friday tracee left and so did Ed and i was sad. Hung out with Sean all day. he texted me at nine in the morning to say he'd gotten a b on his psych exam and to ask if i wanted to smoke and get mickey d's. we were two minutes late in the drive-thru, so we went to the store and bought stuff for our own. Made a huge breakfast then hung out in my room cause zach was being a jerk. Sean took a na on the futon and i took a shower. Talked and hung out and stuff then Went to the mall with Danielle. Came back and made Fajita's with B and Tania and Koife. Sean came and said goodbye; he went to his brother's for the weekend. We watched this indian movie and batman and i wrapped gifts. Wes came in and was a total dickwad and i passed out while everyone was still in my room.

Saturday danielle went home and i pretty much chilled all day. went to Meijer around 9 at night. Dana was over and we talked before i left. Came back and a bit later zach and wes showed up and i told wes he had been an ass. We went outside and smoked hookah and talked about stuff. Met this badass chick named Michelle and this one girl who was super drunk after a wedding. so funny. went back to my room and talked a while. Zach wanted to sleep on the futon, but i made wes take him out. Got a text from sean asking if i wanted to watch batman and get a pizza when he came home.

Sunday i don't remember a lot of... pretty much hung out in my room until sean came home that night around 8. I think i cleaned and stuff. went and smoked with him and wes and zach. Wes isn't as good at the assistance as sean is... came home and watched tropic thunder with Zach and Wes. Wes went to bed and sean went and took a shower then went to bed.

Monday, sean had work until 3:30. He came home around 4:30 cause he went shopping. I guess zachleft and wasn't returning sean's calls cause he's pissed at him. I called zach and he answered, but as soon as i mentioned sean, he hung up and stopped responding to me as well. Let's see. We hung out and talked for a while, sean made ramen and we drank some more... we talked about the weekend and music and stuff. Hung out with wes for a while and then we decided to go hang with this kid derrick. He's bad ass. so effing funny. we drove around and talked and shit. listened to his band. Then Sean and i went home and made cheese and bacon fries. I guess i talked about a lotof random stuff and rambled for a while, then ate literally one fry. We took a nap and cuddled and he was going to sleep in my room, but i passed out and he had to work in the morning anyway.he kissed me on the cheek and left. i got sill texts in the middle of the night. lol.

Tuesday he worked again, so i hung out and cleaned again. Wes and i hung out until sean came home. we hung out, then he and wes went to smoke ciggs and disappeared to play guitar for an hour. I took a nap and watched tv. Started packing. Sean came in an hour later and said he was going to take Derrick to a recording session and would be gone for a couple hours and asked if i was okay with that. I was like, yeah, i don't care. He left and i went to the mall to buy some last minute finishing gifts. Came back and watched the Crow and packed. I got a text at nine that he was on his way home and really sorry. He came home and we went and sat in his car and talked. He played the song iris by the goo goo dolls and said it reminds him of me. I cried, that song always makes me cry. then we smoked and went to Mickey D's and ordered a ton of food. Came home and ate and made more fries adn chicken. He asked what time my appointment was on Thursday, so i called my mom at 11:30 and asked. Good choice. He wanted me to stay until thursday. Talked some more, then he had to go to bed. i called ash at 2 am to talk. sorry bro.

Wednesday i finished packing and cleaned my room completely. Made a ton of cupcakes for sean. took out the trash and took my bottles out. Put half of my stuff in the car before getting too lazy. Sean came home at 3:30 and we hung out watching 3oh!3 videos and looking at lyrics online. He kept saying he didn't want me to leave and i didn't want to either. We needed to take the rest of my stuff out, and he asked if i wanted help then stopped and said to himself, fuck that, I'm gonna do it anyway. I was doing really well, then iris came on and we were sitting on the couch and he asked if i was excited to go see a movie with ash and i started crying. SO he held me and we talked about not feeling at home and how a home is the people, not the place. He doesn't have a home. The Buhl house will never be his home. Until he has his own wife and kids and house, he won't have one. So I told him he could come with me and this could be his home. He didn't want me to leave. I gave him all of my foodstuff and while we were taking them to his room he made a comment that he would take some cupcakes to his brother and say that this girl lauren made them and she's my "it's complicated". it made me really happy. i know that's lame but it means we're something, right? Plus it's huge that he's gonna tell his brother about me. So, wes came in as we were getting ready to take my stuff outside and insisted on helping, which sean really didn't seem too pleased about...so we took the stuff outside and they loaded my car and sean wanted to scrap the ice off. I told him he didn't have to but he gave me this look and was like, just give me the freaking brush and get your car warmed up. So i did. sean finished and we stood around quietly for a few minutes before he reminded me that i had to leave. So I hugged him for another five minutes and he kept telling me that he'd miss me and that he loves me and that if i get sad or stressed i can always call and i really wanted to cry. I hugged wes goodbye really quickly, and wished him luck at western. Then i got in viktor and turned my ipod on, backed out, waved goodbye as they lit up corncob pipes and started to bawl as i pulled out of the parking lot.

i miss him.
a lot.

fashionxxvictim @ 2008-12-03T10:05:00

2008-12-03T15:07:29Z

so...my last exam is next tuesday at 6 at night.
I could technically come home wednesday.
But I'm probably not coming home until the following thursday.
I don't know why.

fashionxxvictim @ 2008-11-23T10:08:00

2008-11-24T03:09:12Z

i just don't fucking care anymore.

fashionxxvictim @ 2008-11-08T20:11:00

2008-11-09T01:11:26Z

I am a brunette.

fashionxxvictim @ 2008-11-03T13:10:00

2008-11-03T18:25:08Z

I was not a good girl on Halloween.
I wish he could remeber what happened, but I think he's lying when he says he doesn't remember anything.
He knows I bit him. and He knows he didn't bite me, even though I told him he did.
Kitchen, Hallway, Futon. No getting caught. Everyone got some cheetos.
And thinks we had sex.
Which we didn't.
As bad as t was in Wes' room, once we were in mine, he said no.
He had more than me, but I have no tolerance. You can't take advantage of a boy when he's the one pulling you. Don't close the blinds. Sit down. Move the plate. Get close. Underneath the clothes.
it feels right. you look right.
This is right.
Looking up iinto your eyes, there isn't anything unclean.
You look innocent and in love.
Which you won't let yourself feel when you're sober.
Soon you will. SOon you'll have to give something up. I have to ask you to give something up.
So you can ask me to give mine up. One coping mechanism for another. your smoke for my steam.
no starving and no vomit.
One day, you won't be afraid.
I won't walk away. I can't walk away. There's no need to worry.
The more I know you, the more I need you, and I can't walk away.
I'm falling, but I haven't fallen yet.

fashionxxvictim @ 2008-10-27T13:03:00

2008-10-27T17:26:16Z

I love that I can fuck things up,
and then the best way to fix them is by getting fucked up.
Isn't that the beauty of college?

Things have been weird all week.
Monday I got cock blocked and Tuesday Zach and I had to take Sean to the hospital because he had really severe strep. SO i skipped class Wednesday to take care of him. We went to meijer to get his meds and some groceries. Hung out all day, until Sean went to get his psych stuff from his car, and discovered it was unlocked and his backpack was gone. $100 psych book and probably $75 worth of Art supplies gone, but nothing else was touched. Bullshit.
Thursday and friday sucked. Won't evenlook at me, won't talk to me. Creepers sleepin my room, then whore's sisters. I'm over protective, but not for myself. It's all for Allen and Jake. I don't care if he gets fucked up from friday to Sunday. He had a bad week. He thought I'd be mad at him. I WANTED him to. He needs to test his self-control. It's better than they think. He has it, he just surpresses it sometimes. It isn't as though he's a bad person because he can't cope with the shit thrown at him.
My parents came over on Saturday with Ashley. It sucked at first, because my dad got mad, but by the end I had so much fun. I love them and miss them so much sometimes. Everyone on my floor loved them. Tracee, Allan and Sean went to dinner with us. Sean and my dad talked the entire time, about cars, and drugs, and college. I guess my dad told him about my mom not getting her degree because she got preggars with Ash. He, for some reason, chose to remember this. They get along really well. I think it's because they're a lot alike, which is funny, really. When we went out on Sunday, he was talking about making a good impression on the rents. It would be amazing if we ever date; he fits in with this shit really well. My mom told me that he could definitely come to Thanksgiving, that he HAS to if he has nothing else to do, but his family's coming up and he's on good terms now. But he seemed disappointed he couldn't go.
Anyway, we cleared things up. We're going running later and last night was amazing.
I finally understand why boys act like they do. It's easy to have sex with someone you don't care about, but you have to wait if you actually want to date a girl. That's good, because I don't want to be a cheap whore, no matter how bad i want it sometimes. I know that doesn't sound like something I'd say, but I'm all fucked up. I stopped taking those BCPs, because i was a total bitch, and i have no more refills. Maybe I'll get it changed the next time i go home, but i'm not concerned. Unless something is immaculately conceived, I'm safe.
Oh, yeah, and i started reading the bible. It's actually really interesting. I don't understadn a lot of it, so i have to ask Sean, but afterwards...i kind of feel like a better person. I don't feel as angry or resentful. It's not like I'm born again, or anything, but finally someone is explaining it in ways i can understand. I'm pretty much transitioning to deism for now. There is a God, I just don't know exactly how much he interacts with his creation.
SO, that's it. Take it or leave it. Call me a poser, or a conformist or whatever you want. I haven't been influenced or brainwashed and I'm not doing it for him. He's doing it for me. I don't care. Everything I do here makes me happier.

fashionxxvictim @ 2008-10-19T19:18:00

2008-10-19T23:19:30Z

Does anyone know where I could find a green corset? Or even a corset style top.
ONe that's not terribly whorey, but still cute and fun.

I need one for Halloween, but all the one's I've found are like, 50 dollars.
I'm aiming for the twenties.

fashionxxvictim @ 2008-10-17T02:36:00

2008-10-17T06:50:40Z

So, here's a tiny update on my situation:
-tracee got back together with her boyfriend, solving a problem that had already pretty much disappeared.
-went to a badass show with some badass kids and realized why Linds loves Chris, and that they will be cute when he's level headed.
-I need to go running more often.
-i need to spend more time studying, and less time taking naps with Sean.
-Roman is totally badass, as is the russian RA.

So, yesterday, I went to Lansing to go to the PInk Tie Affair. It was an acoustic set with the graduate, thewhite tie affair, Cute is what we aim for, and Boys like Girls.
I have some sweet pics. I drove sean's car, and he took viktor. He was supposed to comewith us, but he needs to focus on class. We got home around one and I went and hung with him while doing art for a while. He made me eggs, then Esha came in and wouldnt leave. Then Cookie and Alicia came, and he wanted to go to bed, so he politely told everyone to get the fuck out. Except, apparently, I wasn't supposed to leave. So as soon as i get in my room, there's a knock from Esha, and I go back to Sean's and I spent the night. He had work at 9, so he had to get up around 8, and his alarm was loud. He didn't want to get up, so he was late. He said I look cute when i sleep and kissed me on the cheek goodbye, but missed and got the comforter. I slept for another hour, then i did the dishes and went back to my room to shower before Allen cameover. I took him to the dollar store and grocery shopping. That kid is insane. I got pringls and candy, and bought sean a picture frame. I bought Allen a 3 liter of pop, like he needed caffeine. Came home, hung out with sean and allen. Allen had class at 4:30, so Sean did art for a while, then we talked about his brother and took a nap. I had a meeting at 6, which I was late to because i woke up late. Went to the meeting then tracee and i went to the halloween store. Tried on costumes and wigs. SO bad. Came home, hung out with Sean, took another nap. Cookie came in, waited for food, sean went to smoke, took hours to get food. Kiss kiss. backseats and McDonalds. Wes came home drunk. Sean has totake care of him, otherwise it was sleep on the sofa night. Melissa came home. She's the shit. Now it's much to late and I need to go to bed. I'll tell you guys more later.

fashionxxvictim @ 2008-10-09T12:44:00

2008-10-09T17:22:39Z

So, I should be writing my philosophy paper. However, that shit is easy as fuck and I don't care. I have until 3 to keep writing before I'm going out, and then I have from 6 to 9 while Sean's at his sister's volleyball game where he can't distract me with adorable nonsense.

I wish I talked to you guys more, but I'm so freaking busy all the time. I love living downtown, there's always stuff to do and something to distract me. At the same time, it sucks, because then i have no motivation to study, I'd rather take a nap or walk around or talk to sean, or chill with Aisha, or be badass with linds and tracee.

Time for a recap.
-We'll start with Thursday: went to go see oBama with Aisha and Ed. Had to get up at 6 in the mf morning. I was about to beat a bitch ass. He was running on CPT, and was half an hour late. Still, the speech was amazing. Came home around noon and did laundry and homework, waited for Danielle to call and Sean to get home. We went to the mall, Danielle, Sean, Ed, Sean's friend Allen, and I. I bought a hoodie from pacsun, sandals and running shoes. Came home, sean got bad mail and it sucked. I hate when i can't help him. It was lindsay's birthday, and she was coming home from Chi really late, so Ed and I went to Target to buy her a white board and markers as a present. I felt bad for Sean, so we tried to find himm the Dave Chappelle DVD, but they didn't have it. Instead, I got him a michelangelo ninja turtle.
Friday was a very good day. I don't remember parts of it, but it was very good. Sean drove me to school and after class we went down to Holland to pick some shit up. Came home, tried to take Ty to the bus, but he couldn't get a ticket. Sean lent him his car to get to Lansing and then we had much fun. I might've kissed him, i don't know. Went to bed around one, shocked i made it that long.
Saturday morning, I woke up at nine and he texted me about 10 minutes later. I didn't not feel nice. Sean came down and we talked for a while and took a nap on the couch. Went to his room and hung out for a long time before showering. Pretty much chilled all day; went to Wendy's and had much fun. Still a little screwey. Took many more naps on my couch. Talked to Sean all night, figured shit out. He was pretty messed up, so i thought he wouldn't remember but low and behold:
Sunday morning, i get done drying my hair and there's a knock at my door. Sean and Zach waited for ten minutes before knocking. Zach wanted milk, Sean remembered our talk and sat in my bathroom while i curled my hair. Then we laid on the couch and talked and i got really confused. Went to see tracee's play and then did some homework and hanging out.
Monday sucked. Monday always sucks. Went to class, bummer, it was cold. Hung with Aisha and Sean. Went running with Ed and had KFC.
Tuseday- I skipped french, chose the wrong day, however. PLS 211 got out an hour early, so i went and hung out. Aisha and Tonya and i were talking. Then Aisha went to talk to Sean while he was downstairs. I guess she told him we need to talk, so he came in and then she pulled tonya out of there so we could talk. We kind of worked things out; i can never understand what he's been through, but i can comprehend it and be a good friend to him. it was a really good talk, but he just makes me so sad sometimes. I don't understand how such a good person can be dealt such a shitty hand in life. All i can do is support him and listen and when he feels like his shit is straight, we'll finally be able to date.
It just sucks to wait. But I don't think it'll be long.
Anyway, so we talked until three and he was really tired, so we just slept on my couch. He snores, but in a cute, cat purring kind of way. it was the best sleep I've had in weeks, even though I had to wake him up at 6:20, and his phone kept going off.

So, yeah, in case you haven't figured it out, I spend pretty much every minute I'm not in class with Sean, who I am now in a semi-relationship with. People on our floor constantly ask if we're dating. Kind of-sort of-not officially yet. Hopefully soon though. I think you guys would really like him. He's very our style. If I bring anyone to thanksgiving, it'll be him, but I'm not sure yet.

so cute.

2008-10-02T06:04:13Z

So, I was joking about marriage counseling and being preggars.
The wedding's on for next year, though.
http://www.new.facebook.com/album.php?aid=56002&l=ace91&id=734242063

fashionxxvictim @ 2008-09-30T01:12:00

2008-09-30T05:22:19Z

A very brief up date in my life, in no particular order:

-Lindsay, Tracee, and I have decided to drop out of college and form a rap super group called "Carmel Sundae".
-Lindsay and I are badass, because we are.
-I totally owned my french exam
-I totally bombed Geo
-We had breakfast for dinner, finally.
-my mum came up and hung. She enjoyed it and everyone thought she was dope as shit.
-Thing 1 and Thing 2
-Deep convos with Linds, strange ones with Sean
-SOme people aren't smoking pot all week, and making me very happy.
-Those same people are trying to quit smoking
-Lindsay, Sean, and I danced in the rain.
-Zach was being odd. IDK.
-Wes is over it and just very annoying.
-I have an exam tommorrow, and I don't even care.
-I have no initiative and I feel fine about it.
-I've tried new things that genuinely made me feel good about myself.
-Aisha and Tracee taught me ebonics some more.
-I haven't seen danielle in a while. I need to talk to her.
-Sean gave me his michigan hat, I bought him a Notre Dame one.
-We have entered the two player game.
-We are engaged, in marriage counseling and expecting.
-I'm such a sucker, once again.
Just once, I want someone to mean it. Please mean it, but don't fuck other things up.

fashionxxvictim @ 2008-09-18T15:22:00

2008-09-18T19:24:48Z

This morning we had a fire drill. It woke me up, man.
Everyone was so pissed.
Zach, Wes, Jerry, and I walked around downtown for awhile, now I'm gonna make lunch.

I'm so excited to see you guys tomorrow.
It's gonna be so fucking amazing.
I'm sure everyone will have lots of interesting stories.

Shit son

2008-09-18T07:46:22Z

Man, I only get to post this shit once a week.
I just got back in my dorm; I was gonna make eggs, but it's 2fuckin45.
Let's recap from where we last left off.
Friday, I had class and then everyone was chilling. I was doing homework when Sean busted in and was like, we're going for a walk. I told him to let me finish my chapter and we'd go.So I finished fifteen minutes later and go to his room and Wes has bustd out some booze, so they're already steaming towards getting shitfaced. So much for a walk. It was supposed to be Tracee's bachelorette party, but wes showed up with booze and half the floor got drunk. Ali and I were watching this fucked up Alice video that's stopmotion with Abdul, then some AMVs and finally the LOst Boys. Bethanies and Kai joined us, and then so did Alicia and Zach. Then we watched Nightmare Before Christmas, and Jerry showed up. After Nightmare, everyone left but Kai and we talked about shit until like, 4 in the morning.
Saturday, I woke up at 12:45. Da Fuck? I made pancakes and it was nasty and rainy out, so we went to the mall, ALicia, Ali, Wes, Kai, and I. I wanted to be these dope ass shoes from SHi, but we were leaving. Wes was pissing me off, and kept making comments and shit. Igot really fucking irritated and everyone could tell. I guess later he told Kai and Zach that THEY were iritating me but no. Then we came home and I went down to Tracee's room, cause Aisha said some weird shit happened last night between her and sean. SO Jenelle and I went down there with Aisha, and Lindsay was comming upstairs with laundry. Apparently sean passed out in Tracee's room. SO we hung for like 5 hours while they got ready to go to the ice breaker. I'm learning ebonics. I know a stack, caking, buggaboo, CPT. It's funny shit. Tracee's so cute. Her room is decorated HelloKitty. It reminds me of Irene. We watched dance videos of the spongebob and boys hip rolling. It was fukcing weird. I just kept laughing. Then Lindsay and I left to go eat dinner,and Bethanie, Kai, Zach, and Jerry came over and made hotdogs/played guitarhero/watched Sweeney Todd. Somewhere in this time, Sean came home and told us about how he was fucked up last night and wandered down to division and somebody tried to strangle him. He's got thesebig ass bruises on his neck. Everyone left around three.
Sunday, I got up at 11 and did homework pretty much all day. I edited Kai's paper and it was pretty chill. Hung out with Bethanie and Jenelle for a while.
MOnday was class. I fell asleep during my first lecture, so I went to Danielle's to take a nap, but we just ended up talking about shit. We got lunch and watched War of the Worlds with Jeff and Josh before Jeffand I had to go to Philosophy. Pretty uneventful day. Came home; apparently sean fell asleep on the bus and woke up back at Pew Campus. Silly boy. I was in a weird, tired mood. I was talking with Kai and Bethanie, I think. Then Lindsay showed up to return Batman, and we talked about pretty boys and Jared Leto, and asked if we got MTV, because her TV is all screwed up. It was just set wrong, so Kai fixed it. Her friend's band was on the hills. Dope. I went to sleep at a reasonable time...not really, I just played spidersolitaire all night.
Tuesday was an 8 AM lab and ended at 9"30 PM. I didn't actually make it to my room until almost 1 in gthe morning. Sean kidnapped me to talk while he did his still lives, and then Ali came in to work on her shift things. Then Jerry showed up, and Zach came home from wrok all pissed cause he lost his wallet. We ate chips and I played with Jerry's hair, cause it felt really nice. Jenelle came in with Tracee and Aisha. We hung until almost 2.
Today was sweet. Had class. Fell asleep in lecture. Went to lunch with Danielle, COurtney, and Zach.I was almost late to philosophy. Came home and took a nap, fucked with my computer,cleaned my room and did laundry. Forgot to eat, like a dumbass. Watched project runway and videochatted with my mom. Then I went in the hall coz Kai and Zack needed Seran WRap. Talked to Matt HUck on the phone. Sat in the commons and laughed like morons. No seran wrap, but phone tricks. ENded up in Jenelle's, dancing to music and coloring Obama shit. Jerry is my gay best friend. We're going shopping tomorrow. Sean and Wes turned up drunk. Sean lifted me over his head and almost dropped me, but I was more concerned with my pants falling down. He kept apologizing for almost dropping me. Bethanie and Abdul and Kai showed up and we chilled and took pics and threw knives. Zach brought me a hat, I looked gangsta. More pics and loud noises. Zach had to Carry sean back to their room. SOmehow we migrated there and Tracee and Aishashowed up. Bethanie, Abdul, and Ali left. Sean was eating cereal and Wes was crying. Sean did some very odd things and told me some very sweet things. He's such a sweetheart, but I get so worried if he's okay. It feels like I've known him forever. He kept apologizing and hugging me. We watched Tracee do the Napoleon Dynamite dance. Soeffing funny. Wes left, then Jenelle andKai and Ali. Sean needed to go to bed, but he didn't want to be alone, so he kept asking Zach if he couldsleep on the floor in his room. Then he asked if I wanted to sleep in his bed and he'd sleep on the floor. I was so trashed. Jerry, Aisha, Tracee and I started to leave, but we were still talking to Zach. Tracee and Aisha left and went to the commons, and Jerry got some cereal. We went to talk in the commons and found shit people needed. Jerry went to bed and Tracee, Aisha and I took the stuff back to Zach's. Sean was in bed now, and he kept asking me to stay there. I felt so bad. Aisha's mom called, so she left, and Zachand Tracee and I were at my room, and Zach checked for people in the bathroom. Tracee wrote lyrics on my board, then she had to go to bed. She has class at 8 tomorrow. I sent Zach to make sure Sean was okay, then I finally sat down. Good fucking day.

-somewhere along the way was a hookah, and Jenelle and I wanna learn to blow smoke rings, but it's a really bad idea. We might actually try it though.

fashionxxvictim @ 2008-09-12T01:06:00

2008-09-12T05:24:36Z

So, today I didn't have school.
I woke up at ten and took a shower and got ready, then cleaned my entire apartment for an hour.
I took out the trash and recycling and decided to go to Target and Meijer for groceries and such. I got direction, but I was trying to get there, discovered that a building burned down a few days ago. This is a very distracting sight, thus I missed my turn, not even realizing it was the correct street. However, I didn't loose much time, and bought a white board and stapler and a toaster from target, and a picture frame from the dollar store, and groceries from Meijer. All of the Meijers over here are really nice, and the people are all very nice as well. It's very odd, but in a good way.
SO I came home and Sean and Zach were hanging in the commons, so I put my stuff away and went to chill with them out there. Zach had class at 4, so he and Wes left. Sean got bored of studying and we decided to walk to the gas station. Well, there isn't anything at the gas station, so we ended up just walking downtown, finding the church we saw with Kai. It was day, and I wanted to go in, so Sean was like okay, and we walked up these really steep steps and were joking around that we were going to marriage counseling. So we get inside, and it's pitch black. We go through these really heavy doors, and another set, being really quite because it was dark and freaky. So we were just standing in the doorway, and it was really cool inside, with a big oragn and very traditional. Then I heard a rustling noise around us, and it wasn't sean and it wasn't me, so he was like, we need to leave, so we turn and open the first door really quietly. I was trying to get the second door open, but it wouldn't budge, so he kind of hit it and made a really loud noise and we BOLTED outside. That church is freaking haunted. So of course, we took pics with it and walked down this creepy path. Then we went to GRCC, and we were gonna go see the burned building, but he had to go to a job training thing at 5:30, so we went home and I chilled with Bethanie for a while, doing some reading. Then everyone was in the hall again, and we went to study in the commons, Sean and Jerry came back. Then Sean and Abdul went to get groceries and Zach and I listened to Spice Girls and Avenue Q. Then Jerry finished his shower and we went to play guitar hero. Suddenly, a bazillion kids were in my room and I painted Abdul's name and put eyeshadow on him (I got pics) and we ate pizza.
Then Lindsay came over with her friend to see if I had any funny movies, but I didn't, so they borrowed batman. We talked about concerts and flying and jobs. During this time, all of the sheets were ripped off my bed and Sean fell asleep in a pile of pillows. He was a bit out of it, so Zachtook him to bed, coz he didn't have his key (They're roommates, not gay, just so you know). Then Ed, A, and Tracee went to study. We played guitar hero for a while, and Ally and Kai joined us before we all realized it was one in the morning, and needed sleep.
It was an interesting day.

whatupgvsu?

2008-09-08T04:31:34Z

pretty busy weekend here.

Friday, Went to Meijer after class and grabbed some groceries. Danielle and CHelsea came downtown and we walked around downtown. They were celebrating the river, it was like their sterlingfest. SO, we came back to my sorm and chilled for a bit, then they left for ALlendale. Sean and I were chilling in my room watching TV when Danielle called and said they needed a ride since the buses weren't running. They were, but it was minimal schedule or something. SO I came home and chilled with Bethanie and we went and met some kids at the far end. Hung out with Nick's roomie Abdul, who is totally badass. His jaw is wired shut coz he broke it playing bball, but he gets it off in three weeks. He can only drink ensure and stuff. Bummer. SO, we hung with him and Zack, Sean's roomie, and I swiffered his floor and then fireworks were happening, so we ran downstairs and watched. Then we came back up and Nick was in his room, doing stuff, abdul just hung with me and we played Guitarhero. I totally owned him. Then he went to his room, and Alli, Kai, Janelle, and Aisha came home from the movies, so we hung in Alli's room until 2:30.

Saturday, I hung out at home until 5ish, then I headed to Alelendale to meet Danielle, Chelsea and Erin. However, everyone was in the hall and distracted me with talk of burgerking and trips to Holland. Went to game and sat with Erin. We had hotdogs; no hotchocolate yet. We won, like 49 to 21. It was fricken freezing, so we didn't stay till the end. I went home and fell asleep.

SUnday, woke up around noon and made pancakes. Opened my door and did some homework. Hung with Bethanie for a bit, then more homework, then hung with sean. He gave me a joker toy. He's such a sweetie. He had to go to the Mac lab, so he left and I watched a french movie, then hung with Bethanie some more. More homework, made dinner, then went downstairs to do laundry. Kai was doing laundry too, then Sean showed up and we ditched our laundry in the dryer and neglected the rest of reading to walk around downtown with them. Tried to find somewhere to eat. We found a ton of clubs, and a bondage shop, and some weird people. Talked about first impressions and weird things. Visited a church that looked pretty and had a gay flag. Then we went and got pizza and came home around 11. HUng in Janelle's room with Aisha, Zack, Sean,Kai and Wes. DId the crank dat dance and the Kat Williams club dance. Showed them technoboyjustin. We were very loud and got yelled at. Ketchup and mustard.
Now I'm tired. I've got class in the morning. Bummer.
i miss you guys.

fashionxxvictim @ 2008-09-06T02:32:00

2008-09-06T06:33:20Z

I just got backin my room.
I love my dormies.

There's going to be a wedding, but I'll talk in detail in the morning.

Gotta check my mail box.

2008-09-04T19:47:07Z

You know what I really hate about Grand Valley?
EVery morning I get up and shower and dry my hair and make it cute and it looks sooooo good.
But by the time I get to class, the humidity has made it poof up, and ruin my bangs. No Good.

Other than that, I love it here.
Open door policy.
chicka chicka.
I miss you guys, but so much is happening, I barely have time to think about it.
WHich is good,right?
I'm not sad.
But I miss you.
Let's hang out.

fashionxxvictim @ 2008-08-23T01:10:00

2008-08-23T05:14:52Z

so, i was trying to park in the overflow lot, but a scary man in a truck was sitting there and freaked me out, I sat in my car for 15 minutes before jumping out and running across the street in a panic.

I will NEVER stay that late in Allendale again, unless I'm spending the night.
Call me a pussy, but I live downtown, like, the middle of a city.
I'm small and blonde and white.
Now I have to wait until the morning to get the shit out of my trunk that my mum sent up with Rice.

Now I'm all anxious and panicky.